I want to let you in on a secret – the day of my wedding, I was menstruating. That’s right – I was on my period, in my big beautiful white dress, for the whole ceremony. And you know that scene they always have in romantic comedies when the wife-to-be has to get her friends to help her use the bathroom? Well, I had to do that too – on my period. My two best friends had to help me maneuver my dress so I could switch out my organic, cotton tampon!
Joking aside – when I’m menstruating I feel like my emotional self fully integrates with my more bookish, cerebral self, which is actually great for events full of deep feeling, like my wedding day, and for connecting with those I love. I was on my period the day that I did my TED talk too, in fact I think it helped me to better communicate my passion with the audience. As I don’t experience a difficult, problematic period anymore – I worked hard to get my body and hormones into a place where I feel good all month in fact – so now I am free to tap into the skills my hormonal alignment at this time can give me.
Of course, if I had gotten married or given my TED talk when I was ovulating, or in my follicular or luteal phase, I would have benefited from the other amplified skills and talents I have access to during those times. I just don’t see having my period on important days as detrimental, and I don’t dread it.
However I know that, for many women, looking at the calendar to realize that your period coincides with your wedding day, your anniversary, your week’s vacation, or Valentine’s Day can provoke real panic and anxiety. If you experience PMS symptoms, cramps, heavy bleeding, or if your period just likes to surprise you so you never quite know when it will turn up, then feeling like your period will sabotage your most special days is completely understandable. We worry that we’ll be in pain, feeling crabby, exhausted, or even confined to bed, when we most want to be at our best. You don’t have to take the pill to deal with your period.
First of all, I want you to know that your period does not have to be like this! You can have the perfect period. The Flo Living protocol has eliminated –
and even PMS (which by the way is not “normal”)
for me, and for literally THOUSANDS of women, the world over.
How to stop your period ruining your Valentine’s Day
I know Valentine’s Day is right around the corner and you might feel you are heading straight for a period-sabotaged day, regardless of what lovely romantic plans you and your partner have cooked up. I want to give you some effective, practical solutions so you can look forward to February 14th, or any other special day on your calendar that happens to coincide with a visit from the PMS fairy or Aunt Flo.
If you’re in your luteal phase right now (or premenstrual, as it’s also known) here are 3 things you can do in the days leading up to Valentine’s Day (or any special day) so you feel good and enjoy the opportunity to connect with your partner. Then, for the day itself, I have a couple of suggestions to help you cycle-sync your Valentine’s Day to fit your mood.
What you should do if you’re PMS’ing on Valentine’s Day
- Eat PMS-fighting foods. Fill your meals with foods rich in B vitamins, magnesium, calcium and fiber. This will rebalance your hormone levels and make the luteal phase transition smooth and easy. I’m talking about millet, sweet potatoes, cauliflower, squash, apples, dates, chickpeas, walnuts, beef and cod (you can find a whole grocery list of suggestions for this phase in my book “Woman Code”).
- Listen to your cravings. Do you desperately want chocolate? Then have some chocolate! Good quality, organic, 70% dark chocolate is a PMS-combating superfood packed full of magnesium to alleviate anxiety, insomnia, and bloating. If you crave pasta, soda or coffee – I’ve got you covered there too with healthy, satisfying alternatives that won’t make your period a problem.
- Schedule in some self-care. If you usually love your me-time when you’re on your period, schedule some of this in before it arrives this month so you don’t miss it and can still benefit from that important time out. Having some alone time will make being with your partner on Valentine’s Day so much more enjoyable for you and for him! Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? Create some at-home spa treatments and be your own Valentine for the night! Or celebrate “Galentine’s” Day by having a girls night in with the kind of best friends who leave you feeling refreshed and positive.
What you should do on Valentine’s Day If You have your period
I usually suggest that during the menstrual phase women take their me-time and let their partner get his fill of guys’ nights out, so they can have some space to themselves. However, Valentine’s Day and other special days are all about connecting with others, so this is not always possible or desirable. That said, you can cycle-sync your Valentine’s Day to fit your hormone cycle and align what you choose to do to celebrate with how you will be feeling. Here are a couple of things you can do to make the day a time for real, genuine connection and love.
- Shift your thinking about sex. I know some women are uncomfortable with full sex when they’re on their period and that’s a big reason we might see our periods as potentially sabotaging our anniversary, vacation or Valentine’s Day. Of course, it’s absolutely fine to abstain when you’re menstruating and find other ways of connecting with your partner through touch. But you can also certainly do everything but actual intercourse for a sexy evening too – perhaps take a bath together, engage in the 5 C’s of self-pleasure together and just be with each other physically, with the pressure off. You might find you enjoy it even more!
- Romantic Evening At Home. I don’t know about you, but I don’t enjoy restaurants when I’m pre-menstrual or on my period – food is so commonly over-salted, it makes me mad and it makes me feel bloated! Get some cycle-synced restful, introverted, us-time by eschewing the rush to make reservations and get dolled up for a big night out and instead just stay home. If you power through the standard romantic evening because you feel you have to when you’re not in the mood, you’ll only feel grouchy and tempted to displace that frustration onto your partner. It’s so much better to create a comfortable, cosy night in, whether that means cooking together, or playing card games, or watching a movie. You don’t need to be in a fancy restaurant to feel romantic.
Always remember, that once you have the right information about how your body really works, you can start making health choices that finally start to work for you! You can do this – the science of your body is on your side!
to your FLO,
Good things come in threes:
I want to hear from you!
First, how do you feel about getting your period on special occasions?
Second, do you feel like you never know when you’ll get your period?
Third, everyone you know is hormonal – spread a little good ovary karma and share this article on social 😉
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