When it comes to libido, women with PCOS have one of two experiences – there are those who have a relatively high sex drive and those who experience a very low sex drive.
If you want to enjoy a healthy, pleasurable sex life you need to work with the PCOS libido you have to make sure you’re getting what you need. As a result of working with so many PCOS sufferers, and being a former PCOS sufferer myself, I have developed strategies that allow women with high or low libido to reinvigorate and reinvent their sex life and relationship from a basis of cycle awareness and hormonal understanding.
Here at Flo Living I often hear women with PCOS say that they just “don’t feel like a woman” – is this a feeling you connect with too?
The source of this unease is your testosterone levels and how high testosterone can push you to stay in your masculine energy all of the time. Or, alternatively, it can be sourced in how low testosterone can make you feel disinterested in sex and the person you love, in either case making you feel unfeminine.
As a former PCOS sufferer myself, I personally had the high testosterone/high libido experience. In this post I’ll talk you through how this made me develop a unique approach to my relationship.
Those two types of PCOS in regards to sex drive look like this:
- Low libido – due to low testosterone levels and high sex hormone binding globulin levels (SHBG). Women experiencing this do not usually have other symptoms like acne and hair loss/unwanted hair growth.
- High libido – due to high testosterone levels and low sex hormone binding globulin levels (SHBG). Women with this kind of PCOS will normally have issues with acne and hair loss/unwanted hair growth.
My own high testosterone levels had an impact on every area of my life – energetically it led me towards living predominantly in my masculine energy. I began to consciously balance this out by practicing ways of connecting to and nurturing my feminine energy. I found this much more satisfying in my romantic relationships, so I could feel like I was receiving more from my partner in and out of the bedroom.
So, how do you know if you’re experiencing a masculine/feminine energy imbalance personally and in your relationship due to high testosterone levels?
- You feel disconnected from your emotions.
- You find it difficult to receive focused touch from your partner.
- You find it hard to verbalize your feelings to your partner.
- You feel like you have to take the lead in your relationship in general
If you have low sex drive as a result of low testosterone levels then you may also be experiencing these symptoms:
- vaginal dryness
- gaining weight around your middle
- problems retaining muscle mass
For more on low testosterone or “low T” visit my previous post.
Now, to stay balanced in my relationship, I just let my cycle take the lead so I’m always dancing in a balanced way between my masculine and feminine energies.
I find I like to take charge in the bedroom when I’m in my ovulation phase and my testosterone levels are at their peak. During this time I get the most pleasure out of being in charge and being proactive about my desires. During the rest of the month, however, I prefer to be the one who is pursued!
Here are the strategies I use in my own life and those I recommend to my Flo Living clients:
Low libido with PCOS
Leverage your Peak Testosterone Time
Use what’s happening with your body to your advantage. If you have low testosterone levels, your testosterone production will still find its peak when you’re in the ovulation phase. So start by tracking your cycle so that you know when you’re ovulating and can plan ahead! Make the most of that time. Clear your calendar! Plan a few date nights with your partner and let him in on the secret! Then make sure you focus on the foreplay, because it might take you a little longer to feel ready, especially when you are not in your ovulation phase. Spend some time getting to know what feels good for you and then teach your partner what you need.
Make more testosterone naturally
To increase your testosterone levels and lower SHBG maximize zinc and saturated fats in your diet. Avocados are a wonderful source of bioidentical testosterone and beans and seeds are packed full of Zinc (although you could also supplement with 50mg daily).
High libido with PCOS
Practice Receiving Pleasure
Connect with your feminine energy. It’s not fun or pleasurable to always be the one who is leading, initiating, and dominating in a relationship. It can bring about resentment if you’re never in “receiving” mode in your relationship – being pursued, wooed and adored by your partner! Getting into the mode of receiving pleasure from your partner can boost your mood and health. There are many ways you can practice connecting with your feminine energy.
Lower Your Sensitivity to Testosterone
To lower testosterone levels and increase SHBG try saw palmetto extract daily which is anti-androgen (androgens are “male” hormones) and also anti-inflammatory.
A study published in the European Journal of Clinical Nutrition showed that women who ate walnuts increased their levels of SHBG and those who ate almonds decreased their free androgen levels. In study published in the Iran Journal of Reproductive Medicine, women who were given omega-3 supplements saw their testosterone levels decrease. Instead of supplements you can increase salmon in your diet.
Women with both types of PCOS libido will certainly benefit from cycle-syncing their relationship, alongside their diet and wider lifestyle choices.
Always remember, that once you have the right information about how your body really works, you can start making health choices that finally start to work for you! You can do this – the science of your body is on your side!
to your FLO,
Good things come in threes:
I want to hear from you!
First, has PCOS affected your sex life?
Second, which do you experience – a high or low libido?
Third, everyone you know is hormonal – spread a little good ovary karma and share this article on social 😉
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